Today I am reminded of God's unfailing love for me. I know that the only path to happiness is through Christ and I wish I had instilled this in my daughters when they were younger. Thinking about my oldest child's struggles, I can't help feeling guilty that my faith was not stronger when she began going down a dark path. But I don't even know if she would have cared back then or if it would have really mattered or that she would have even listened to my words.
The truth is that God is the only one that can save her. That is not up to me. It never has been. And I can't continue living my life wondering "what if" I had done this or "what if" I had done that. It is already done. I have control of this one moment. Luke 19:10 tells us "For the Son of Man came to seek and to save the lost." I was lost and He saved me. Now she is lost and I know He can save her too.
I want to learn to live more in the moment. There is so much to be thankful for and each day is truly a gift. When you are the mother of an addict, you are constantly waiting for that phone call that is going to change the course of your life forever. It is hard to live in the moment with the constant worry. But that is my hope and prayer today. I want to revel in the moments I have left on this earth with the people who love me. I am learning to let go.
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