Trust God

Sometimes I hate my life. I am in this space and I hate it and I am tormented by it. I scream out to God asking why? Crying why have you put me in this space and why can't I just be happy? But happiness seems as elusive to me as my dying youth. And just when I think it can't get any worse, God speaks to me like He always does through my music and I hear the words "you are not trusting God". And He is right. I am not trusting God's purpose for putting me where I need to be and that is why I am so unhappy. God has never once put me through anything that didn't make me a better person and yet, when confronted by a seemingly hopeless situation which is really where I need to be trusting Him the most, I resort to my old ways and I am mad at God.

Recently I feel like I am surrounded by death. A co-worker literally dropped dead at his desk last week and just yesterday my sister-in-law had a close family friend commit suicide. They were 41 and 24. So young and so tragic. I am reminded of how little time we have in this life and how precious it is. I think happiness is a gift that we can give back to God. I think He wants us to be joyful and when we are it makes Him happy. When life gets in the way of your joy, you have to find joy in other things and I think you should constantly be seeking joy. And I mean JOYFUL JUBILATION. The kind of joy that makes you want to scream it from the roof tops. When you can do that even in the midst of torment, I think you will have mastered life.

My message today is pretty clear. Listen for God to lead the way. And when you are lost just wait for God to hand you the baton so you can run through it until you get to the other side of your struggles. Maybe you are here because you needed time to reflect. Maybe you are here because God is saving you from heart ache that could be a million times worse than your petty little struggle today. I think that is what I keep forgetting. It could be so much worse. So be thankful for God and be thankful for this moment, no matter how crappy it is and above all Trust God.